Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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