U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
