As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
