just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Sorry about my life...
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
