was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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