We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize