I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Randomize
