i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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