it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
