Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
