I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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