grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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