just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
