come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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