Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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