Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
