Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
