She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
