You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
