I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
