Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
