Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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