thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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