i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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