on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
