On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
