So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Randomize
