you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize