My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
