honey bunches of taint.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
