I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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