hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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