Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Pappa wants mamma naked
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
