We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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