R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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