it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
