Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I am full of burrito and curiosity
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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