Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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