my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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