Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize