all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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