What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
