: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize