You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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