all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Randomize