At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
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