hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
