can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
