I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
