His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
