he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
