I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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