I looked at my own cervix.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
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